Give Shoelover an open bar,

dance floor and sweet table...................and watch out.  Things Shoelover learned at a wedding last night:

• If you are going to hit on a bridesmaid, make your first choice the one wearing the clear heeled shoes, she's probably the easiest;
• Hair extensions can look like a mullet on the wrong person;
• When writting a wedding speech or any speech for that matter, start with the premise that no one cares what you are going to say and that you are not funny;
• Wearing a low cut dress does give other people the right to stare at your boobs, not touch, but stare, even if you are cousins;
• Alcohol makes other people seem nicer;
• Watch the way married couples interact with each other, you would be surprised how many of them don't like one another.  This is always a surefire way to entertain yourself for a bit; and
• Whoever comes up for a cure for sagging female triceps will retire a rich person.

xoxo
Shoelover

Comments

[Wedding Forum]

hahaha what a great and funny article! Thanks